June 1, 1991

Twenty years ago today, I married my best friend.  Yes, it was 1991 (that explains the "Jade Green" decor).  We had a simple wedding, but included all of the elements that were meaningful to us.  Attended by our close friends and family, it was an intimate, spiritual occasion.  It's funny how it seems like only yesterday the event took place, and yet we've had so much "living" since that time.  I look at how young we were, although we were older than the average bride and groom, and sometimes wish for that naturally dark hair and wrinkle-free face.  But one thing I've learned these past twenty years is that the gray hair and wrinkles and flabby skin is a mark of life - lived!  Each line, each gray hair is a tribute to an event or milestone we've shared.  There have been many sad times.....loss of pregnancies, job disappointments, the loss of a parent.  But the happy times have overshadowed the sadness.  The birth of children, watching them grow into beautiful, loving, productive young women.  Seeing our oldest daughter marry her high school sweetheart and witnessing them becoming parents (and us grandparents).  Living through our youngest daughter learn to drive (still working on that one).....the graceful aging we achieve is earned - through each day of living and loving in the wonderful gift God has given us.  Each other - the most precious commodity we possess.  Let us not take this gift for granted.  I have been guilty of doing that very thing many times.  So on this day that we celebrate our marriage, let me just say that I love my husband, Richard Williams, with all of my heart.  I am so glad that he asked me to go to the New Kids On The Block concert..........that story is for another day.

"Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.......Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her."   Ephesians 5:22, 25

Babies to Brides

One of the fun things about designing a wedding gown, is to look at the past and toward the future.  I love to incorporate sentimental items into the gown (see previous post), but I like brides to think about the future of their gown.  Not every daughter is going to want to wear her mom's dress (like we all think they will).  It's very fitting to use a portion of the wedding gown, or re-style the wedding gown into a design appropriate for the trend at the time of use.  Many gowns are timeless in style (i.e. Grace Kelly, Princess Kate), but they must fit the personality of the bride to be perfect for her day. 

Think about other ways to make your dress an heirloom.....perhaps someday you'll want a beautiful Christening gown for your child (or grandchild).  A wedding gown is the perfect way to get heirloom quality to pass down from generation to generation.  Styling a Christening gown from a wedding dress is a creative way to recycle, reuse and re-purpose. 

The picture I've posted today is a new dress made for a dear friend and her first baby girl.  The fabric and lace are all new, but I'm hoping someday she'll ask me to use some of this little baby dress in the design of her wedding gown.  It may just be a bow or embellishment somewhere on the dress, or maybe the lace and fabric will be used to make the garter.  Regardless, it is a keepsake that she can use as it is, or re-create it into something else to be passed along in her family.  I can't wait to see photos of this sweet baby in her dress.

Even though neither one of my daughters will wear my wedding gown, I think that we will be sharing pieces of our weddings with each other - sister to sister, mom to daughter, aunt to child.  It's giving tangible evidence to the love that we share for each other.  Something to touch, hold, see, and most of all, feel.

Something Old, Something New.....

As the tradition goes, every bride should have "Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue".  Many brides gather these items for their wedding day without knowing the origin of this saying.  It is believed to be an old English saying, probably from the Victorian era.  The items are meant to be good luck tokens for the bride.  Something old represents continuity with the brides' family and her past.  Something new represents optimism and hope for a new life ahead.  The borrowed item, usually from a happily married friend or family member, symbolizes her good fortunes carrying over to the bride.  It can also be a reminder that the couple can depend on friends and family members.

The color blue has been connected to weddings for centuries.  It can symbolize love, modesty, fidelity and purity.  Often ignored is the last line to this quaint saying "and a sixpence in her shoe".  I would have had a major blister had I put a coin in my shoe!  This represents wealth and financial security.  Many companies sell keepsake sixpence coins for weddings.

When I design a gown, I love to incorporate some of these items into the dress.  When my daughter Emily was married, I sewed pieces from her prom dresses into her gown.  Blue tulle from her freshman year, an antique buckle from her sophomore year, a piece of silk from her junior year with her new married monogram and the wedding date stitched into the gown (see photo).  Each of these items had special meaning for Emily and made her dress even more personalized.  Maybe for you it's using lace from  a baby bonnet you wore, or a grandmother's handkerchief that can be put into the gown somewhere.  Maybe it's a part of your mom's dress that can be used in the design of your new gown.  Let your creativity go wild.....it makes for an heirloom to be passed from generation to generation, and traditions for your new family to start.

The Royal Wedding

What a lovely day! I was among the billions of people up before dawn to watch two people joined in marriage in what has been termed "the wedding of the century".  I've been glued to the television all day, watching every angle and opinion of the "royal couple".  I admit, it was a beautiful ceremony and the bride was radiant, but I have to say that I am very grateful that we Americans don't embrace hat wearing like the Brits do.  Some were similar to what I've seen in some Dr. Seuss literature.......

The commentary that I listened to was quite entertaining!  Everyone has an opinion, and depending on the network being watched, some were more opinionated than others.  One comment referred to the maid of honor wearing white and "upstaging" the bride.  I will weigh in on that one!  The photo below is a gown and bridesmaids dresses I designed from 1997.  It was one of the most beautiful weddings I've seen, and the dresses were timeless.  To me, it was very elegant, tasteful, and the only one that stood out was the bride (who was gorgeous)!  Times have changes, etiquette rules have changed, and weddings have become a personal style statement involving both the bride and groom.  I say if the bride chooses white or off-white for her bridal party, it is exactly that:  her choice.  I love monochromatic color schemes - they photograph beautifully and what you see are the features that are truely unique to us; hair color, eyes, expressions.  Close your eyes and imagine your photographs with the color scheme you are dreaming of.  Do you want to see those colors 20, 30 or 50 years from now?  (I'll refer to an earlier blog that mentioned my wedding color scheme - jade green....hmmmmm.....)

Have fun planning!  I'll be happy to give you my opinion, but remember it's your wedding day.  When I say "your", I mean you and your future spouse.  Let him be in on the planning, too.

Destination Weddings

This was last summer in Costa Rica......what a lovely bride and wedding party!  This was such a fun gown to create because it was non-traditional, yet so classy and elegant.  I would loved to have attended this one!  Molly looked beautiful and the backdrop was simply gorgeous!

The Wedding Ceremony

As weddings are planned, most of the attention is placed on the visual aspects of the day.  The dress, the flowers, food, decorations.......it's so easy to get caught up in the things that are not as important as the "why" of the day. 

Nearly twenty years ago, I married my best friend.  We had a simple, yet elegant wedding and I did most everything there was to do.  Made the dresses, shopped for the food, chopped celery and carrots.....I remember getting bogged down in the long list of things to be done and feeling overwhelmed.  My good friend (and wife of the pastor who married us) gave me some sage advice that I have repeatedly passed along to any bride who will listen to me.  Sheila said to me, ( in her most beautiful southern accent) "Becky, on Saturday morning, you and Richard and David are gonna be at that church, and you are gonna be married, and nothing else matters."
How right she was.  It didn't matter what color my nails were, or if the bows on the pews were the right shade of jade green (yes, it was the color of the season).  The fact was that on Saturday, June 1, 1991, Richard and I made vows to each other and to God in the presence of our friends and family.  The little things that I worried about getting done then are not even a memory to me now. 

So if you are a bride-to-be reading this, or even a seasoned marriage veteran, remember not to get bogged down with the unimportant.  Focus on the love of your spouse, the blessings God has bestowed upon you, and the life you share together.  Somehow everything else seems a lot less important.

Two are better than one!

My dream job has finally come true!  Designing wedding gowns has been my dream for almost a lifetime.  After designing and making over 15 gowns, I am officially doing it as a career.  How rewarding it is to see the radiance of a bride on her wedding day!


Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 says "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken."

I think that all marriages should use this verse as a guideline for success.  Without God as the third strand in the marriage cord, all would seem hopeless by human standards.  Without the solid foundation of Christ in marriage, you have just a wedding with some beautiful photographs.  My job starts after the committment of two hearts inviting Christ to share in their future together.   Now we can have some fun!  I hope you will join me on the journey of little girls' dreams  of their wedding day turning into reality.